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How to get over a girl breaking up with you

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There's no getting around it: Breakups are terrible, even if they're handled with compassion. They can shake you to your very foundations, causing you to question your confidence AND your faith in love itself. If you've been broken up with, you're grappling with the very real pain of rejection on top of mourning a lost love. When you're the one who chose to end things , there's often guilt swirled into your sadness. Even in the most amicable, mutual situations, a split is an ending—and in a culture that emphasizes "forever" as a relationship goal, we're made to feel like an ending is a failure.

SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: How To Breakup Like A Man - Tips To Heal Your Heart

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SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: How To Break Up With Your Girlfriend Without Hurting Her Feelings

20 ways to make her leave you!

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As we all know, breaking up is hard to do. For the average person, it's the only time in our lives when we deliberately say something that makes someone else cry. It's awful. It's horrible. It's inhuman. So, how do you get round it? How do you slip the noose without causing pain? Make her break up with you. Shift that responsibility. Unshoulder that blame. Turn yourself into the injured party and leave her pride intact. With a little cunning, you can easily create a case of constructive dismissal.

How is that to be achieved? You might think you need to do something really awful to get yourself dumped - cheat on her or break her heart. Not at all! Don't waste trauma on something that might not work. Women are weird. Love is stubborn. Broken trust and shattered confidence don't stop a girl loving someone.

Break her heart and you run the risk that she'll still be there, all the time, but constantly miserable. You don't need that in a girlfriend. You've already got a mother. No, the way to drive her away is simply to irritate her. Aim small. Finish the milk without mentioning it. Hog the duvet in the night. Talk with your mouth full.

Forget to pass on phone messages. These are the things that strangle love in the cradle. You may say: but you're a man, you do these things anyway. Need to up the ante, to trigger a passive break-up as soon as possible? Be disgusting. However gender politics wax and wane, women still hate that.

Farting, burping and blowing your nose on your fingers haven't become attractive just because we're all feminists now. Sometimes, you can edge a girl out just by being sufficiently revolting. Why not "furtively" scratch your arse, then tenderly stroke her hair? She'll never fancy you again. The rest will follow naturally. Verbal tics are always useful. Ask her casually, "Do I use the word 'cool' too often?

In every sentence. Dozens of times a day. Soon enough, she won't be able to bear another minute in your company. Crowd her out. Talk over her, boss her around and refuse to be flexible. Be macho, demanding and difficult. As a bonus, you'll get loads of great sex due to your rippling manly ways.

Then, one day, she'll wake up and run screaming back to her life. When dining with her parents, wait until she's talking, then catch her mother's gaze and roll your eyes.

Better still, ask "Was she always like this? If the mum makes a joke at her expense, roar with laughter. In the car home, say: "Your mum's great. I think we really connect.

Dance with enthusiasm when nobody else is dancing. At dinner parties, shout "Come on everyone! Be the first to hit the floor at weddings, pre-empting the bride and groom.

Insist on starting a conga in the pub. It'll be cute the first time. And then it really won't be. You'll be dancing into the horizon. Cry after sex. Even better if you can manage it , during. Have a good old sob. The first time, she will hold you tight and murmur loving words. The second time, she'll ask nervously, "Are you all right? The third time, you'll wake up to find her packing. Be stingy. It's an astonishingly effective tack for making yourself unattractive.

Of course, if you're short of money then this won't work; you'd simply be showing a sensible approach to finances. Undercut this by purchasing yourself expensive designer clothes and a lot of computer games. Whatever you do, don't listen to her. When she's talking about something important, simply tune out.

Respond inappropriately to show you're not paying attention: say "Hmm, that's a pity" when she's delivering great news, and "Oh good" when it's something terrible. On the phone, make sure to tap audibly at an email while she's speaking. Face to face, don't be afraid to actually wander out of the room in the middle of a conversation, as though you assume she's finished.

If she's tearful, be sympathetic - while simultaneously checking your iPhone for football scores. This behaviour will soon drive her into the arms of a kinder and more attentive man, whom she doesn't fancy as much as you but likes better. If you think you can drive a woman away by being nasty to her friends, guess again.

She hates her friends. The ruder you are to them, the more she'll adore you. As for making bitchy remarks about them on the way home, you may as well engrave your name on her heart in gold. Instead, take the opposite tack. Bond excessively with the friends. Take their numbers. Send them funny emails. If she's away for the weekend, hang out with them and watch DVDs. Ring them "just to say hi". She'll tell you how delighted she is that you all get on.

Then she'll dump you and tell the friends they must never speak to you again. On social occasions with people she knows less well, be a bore. I don't mean be quiet: that can be rather sexy at the right time. No, speak up as often and extensively as possible.

Tell dull anecdotes, recount stories about people whom nobody has met. Really hold the floor. She will soon realize that you are social death. You must also take care to be a tremendous bore when the two of you are alone. The key to this is voicing opinions that everybody holds, but as though your insight is new and special. Find long-winded ways of saying that the Lib Dems have sold out, the weather's always bad on bank holidays or the world's too dependent on technology.

Don't just mention these ideas in passing, really spell them out, ideally while she's watching a favourite TV programme or reading a book.

The 11 mistakes that can make a breakup worse — and what to do instead

Often debilitating, usually mentally taxing, and a frequent catalyst of depression , loneliness, and a loss of sense of self — all of which can manifest physically. How long does it take to pick up the million little, heart-shattered pieces and move on? We asked two therapists to weigh in on how long it takes to get over a breakup — and what you can do to expedite your own checkout from heartbreak hotel.

Breakups : most of us have been through one. Some breakups are quick and painless, others gut-wrenching and destabilizing. But what should you do after?

You may be dealing with painful emotions and want to deal with those feelings as quickly as possible. There are several ways that you can work through your painful emotions and start to move on, such as writing about your feelings, allowing yourself to grieve, and being cautious about rebound relationships. Keep in mind that getting over a breakup takes time and patience. Take time for yourself after a breakup to grieve and get back to normal. Immediately after a breakup, self-care, self-compassion and community support should be a focus.

25 Ways to Get Over a Breakup Like a Grown Woman

After one particularly bad breakup, I signed myself up for piano lessons. Attempting to master the keys not only helped pass the time, but kept me distracted from trying to follow my ex's every move on social media — and gave me something to talk about with my friends other than the aftermath of my failed relationship. As it turns out, channeling all that free time into something creative can actually help ease post-breakup pain. I never got past learning the chorus of "Let it Be" — but I did get over the breakup with some help from The Beatles. However, if the thought of getting off your couch post-breakup seems beyond the realm of possibility for you right now, Sabla says staying in can also be beneficial to your healing process, as long as you eventually shake off those Cheetos crumbs and rejoin society. One of the hardest parts of getting over my ex was dealing with the positive memories that would hit me out of nowhere as I was going about my day, whether it was a jingle from a commercial he'd always sing to me or walking past one of the brunch spots that used to be "ours". In fact, the whole breakup would've been much easier if his false accusations and constant attacks on my character were what came to mind instead. But as Travis McNulty , LMHC, a therapist practicing in Florida explains, that's unfortunately not how the chemical process of falling in and out of love works. So basically, going through a breakup is like trying to quit a drug cold turkey. Once you've spent a few nights in with your junk food of choice, it's time to start moving forward.

What to Do When Your Girlfriend Breaks Up With You

A relationship break-up can be tough no matter what the situation. Sometimes you need to prioritise looking after yourself and there are things that you can do to make it easier to handle. You have to do stuff like hang out with friends, eat healthy and get plenty of sleep. After a break-up many people experience a range of difficult feelings, like sadness, anger or guilt, which may lead to feeling rejected, confused or lonely. You might even feel relief which can be just as confusing.

Guys tend to take breakups hard. We slice our suffering into long, dull, depressing chapters.

If you want to get your girlfriend back after a break up, make sure that you avoid the following common mistakes…. If your girlfriend has decided to break up with you and you want her to change her mind and take you back, the first thing you need to do is figure out why she chose to break up with you. Every woman reaches a point in her life or relationship experience where she realizes that she needs a ready-made man, rather than guy who is still working out how to be the man in a relationship.

How To Get Over A Breakup

Chances are you've been through at least one breakup in your life. Nobody finds them easy, but because of the way we're wired — and our desire for connection — we can fall into traps that make breaking up with a partner even more difficult than it has to be. Rhodes, a psychologist, dating coach, and founder of Rapport Relationships.

SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: HOW TO GET OVER YOUR EX INSTANTLY - NO HOPE THEORY - BREAKUP PSYCHOLOGY

In the beginning, it's exciting. You can't wait to see your BF or GF — and it feels amazing to know that he or she feels the same way. The happiness and excitement of a new relationship can overpower everything else. Nothing stays new forever, though. Things change as couples get to know each other better. Some people settle into a comfortable, close relationship.

How to Break Up Respectfully

As we all know, breaking up is hard to do. For the average person, it's the only time in our lives when we deliberately say something that makes someone else cry. It's awful. It's horrible. It's inhuman. So, how do you get round it? How do you slip the noose without causing pain?

Some things to help you after a break up: Give yourself some space. Keep busy. Take time out for you. Talk to friends and family and others who can support you. Try not to use alcohol and other drugs to deal with the pain. Give it time. Try to get regular sleep and exercise.

Skip navigation! Story from Wellness. Breakups are hard. They're an inevitable shock to the system.

According to research published in The Journal of Positive Psychology, it takes 11 weeks to feel better after a relationship ends. But a separate study found it takes closer to 18 months to heal from the end of a marriage. Because love is a messy emotion, and each relationship comes with its own memories and feelings, the end of any relationship will be a unique experience.

There is little worse than heartbreak. Those who know, know. We've all been there!

Nothing can throw you into a pit of despair quite the same way a bad breakup can.

Plus, that dumb trope of women staying inside all day, crying, eating chocolate, and not being able to live ever again is so sexist and not true whatsoever. Buy yourself a big bouquet of pink roses. Put them in a vase, water them, and wait for them to wilt. Guess what?

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